Friends With Benefits

• With no strings attached.
• Just for fun.
• Without romantic drama.
• Whenever you want it.
• Without emotional attachment.

"Stolen water tastes best,
and the food you eat in secret
tastes best of all.

“None who listen to Stupidity
understand
that her guests
are as good as dead.”

Friday, Nov 30, 2007 - 12:55:57 PM
I think friends with benefits may work if the two people feel the same way about each other, but if one feels different it may end up hurting him/her in the end. For girls, sometimes they like a guy so much that they would become friends with benefits with the guy just to be close to him and feel like he wants her. But in the end he really just used her.
- Sarah

Thursday, Nov 29, 2007 - 11:05:51 PM
I've actually never heard of the term until this blog. anyway, It think every part of it would be negative, I mean what if the girl got pregnant or something or std's whatever ya know it's endless. I mean what happens then, it becomes more than just a "friends with benefits" I think either one or the other gets hurt no matter what.
- Jenn

Thursday, Nov 29, 2007 - 8:27:36 PM
I started listining to your show about a month ago and it is just a great way to think of myself and life. This blog helps a lot right now just because of what it is.
- Tyler

Thursday, Nov 29, 2007 - 8:27:22 PM
Hey Dawson I love your show my life lifes ok i had a friends with benefits relationship once and i felt like a wreck over it
- Charles

Thursday, Nov 29, 2007 - 12:12:39 AM
Dawson, I just recently started listening to your show and I really enjoy it. You have really good advice and it helps me too. I am going to continue listening for a long time. This is such a nice thing that you are helping lots of teens with their problems.
- Adrienne

Thursday, Nov 29, 2007 - 12:05:48 AM
This is a great topic.
- Brittany

Thursday, Nov 29, 2007 - 12:04:49 AM
Dawson, This topic gets me so confused that I understand it in a way. (if that makes sense) but for girls my age it is sort of like a fad or trend but I don't think it is going to be temporary unless girls and guys magically become less self centered Though the reason I had ever had a (fwb) had nothing to do with the trend it was simply two people afraid to get hurt by a "actual" relationship and I think guys find it now as a way out of drama or commitment and same with girls but I think that now it is being used as sex on demand or pay per "use" without the paying and I do regret the decision I had made but I find life mistakes that need to be made and unfortunately the mistake part can be a whole persons life Thanking God Once Again With No Regrets, christine
- XChristineX

Thursday, Nov 29, 2007 - 12:03:07 AM
i have a friend with benfits. we don't have sex but we do other things. so i believe you can have friends with benfits and not have sex.
- dani

Thursday, Nov 29, 2007 - 12:00:55 AM
well negatives can definetly be emotional heartbreak if you get attached. also there are the chances of getting pregnant then your whole life will change maybe even the way you're living. and it might seem alright in the beginning but at some point in time you're going to realize what a big mistake you made and it will come back to haunt you and you will regret it!!!don't get into it if you aren't already and stop it right away if you are a FWB.
-

Thursday, Nov 29, 2007 - 12:00:18 AM
When I first got past the "shock" of fwb....I read the blog entries. No need to "preach" here. The testimony of the people who have fallen into this is strong enough.True love will alwys triumph. In our hearts, every human being has a desire to be connected to God. FWB is just a new terminology to what "free-love" meant to those in the 60's and 70's. It is just sin.Most of the religions of the world understand the sanctity of a sexual relationship in a marriage. But as christians,we realize that sin does seperate us from a loving God. And that is why Jesus gave His life for us, so we could repent and be forgiven. AND...live a life of joy and peace and enjoy every beautiful thing this world has to offer..robert n.
- Robert N.

Wednesday, Nov 28, 2007 - 1:29:59 AM
nothing really im 13 and i love having my friends with benefits
- Savanah

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 8:58:31 PM
Hi Dawson. I am 21 years old and live in Ohio. I talked to you maybe 2-3 weeks ago. Anyway, I have had friends with benefits (fwb's) and I'm perfectly fine with it. It's not an issue for me, it's strictly what it is, friends with benefits, no strings attached. I love your show by the way. You have helped me in ways in which you will never know. God Bless You!
- Jasmyn H.

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 7:09:24 PM
Wow. Friends w/ bens. Are you seriously blogging about this. I have 10 friends w/ bens. i'm the chic guyz call when they want to get laid. sorry that was crude, but they can do that b/c i'm not like those chics that start w/ friends w/ bens and then whine b/c they're to attached. getting attached isn't my problem. i have no problem dropping a guy for the slightest thing wrong and i can do that b/c no matter what i kno they'll always be back. There are millions of guys around whats one less. so no i don't have a love addiction. i'm the cold hearted b**ch that leaves the guys to go back to whatever they were doing.
- Amy

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 6:48:55 PM
hey damson i listen to your show every sunday. I think you help alot of people through what you do! An i love to read your bloggs! I think it is cool that you want to help people!
- will

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 6:48:46 PM
I had friends with benifits and it didnt turn out very good. I mean after awhile i got a boyfriend and he was still single and he still want to be friends with benifits and i just didnt know what to do. Soon i liked him more then my boyfriend and it was horrible, he ended up getting unattached right when i got attached i really didnt know what to do. But now we are still friends, ONLY friends and everything is good. I have a boyfriend, and he has a girlfriend and we hang out together in a group all the time. So it turned out bad and good. but mostly good.
- Kaylee

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 6:48:16 PM
well it is pretty stupid but i have done it tons of times before
- christina

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 12:19:36 AM
its not worth it. I had a friend with benefits and eventually he fell in love with someone else. Don't get me wrong because it was a good friend, but that only made it worse. I was hurt a lot and I'm writing to save at least one person from the same agony and pain that I went through.
- Elizabeth

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 12:16:42 AM
I think the whole thing is just plain stupid cause one of you are meantt to get hurt and im pretty sure no one wants to when they have finally moved on.It hurts alot,i know this because i used to be a FWB.
- Jessica C.

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 12:15:32 AM
Alot has been said by the girls, let's say something to the guys about the negatives to fwb. First, as you probably know but may not be aware of, we guys are visual. We are visually attracted and stimulated, and when it comes to sex, we get attached to whatever we see . So if your having fwb's especially multiple benefits, you are being sexually "glued" as it's called to multiple partners and senerios. So, when the day comes, and it will, and you are ready for a stable steady relationship, your ability to be sexually successful with one woman will be psychologically damaged. You'll find yourself in your head revisiting things from the past while fighting to be with your chosen choice in the present. This will take intensive work to turn around, and your relationship might not survive it. No benefit to fwb's.
- Albert

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 12:04:19 AM
You get to attached and emotional involved. It's not worth the pain.
- Shannon

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 12:04:03 AM
Friends with benefits dont really work. i will admit, ive kinda had the friends with benifits thing going on before... and it doesnt work well. there are always gonna be those feelings when u get involved with someone. even if you say, no no no were just friends... with benifits... well there is some kinda feeling there. i dont know i just belive it doesnt work.
- Trina Ann

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 - 12:00:18 AM
I think friends with benefits is fine as long as you set boundaries. I personally have had two. The first girl has a boyfriend now, but were still pretty close. If one of us didnt want to have sex we wouldnt. Just because you have that 'benefit' doesnt mean your gonna have sex every chance you get. I mean sometimes we would just spend the night together and talk. It really made us more intimate and I think beneficial.
- John

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:59:04 PM
Dawson McAllister...Cliche Master
- Brian L.

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:58:39 PM
Hey Dawson i would like to talk to you bout some of my problems.I am 12 years old and i live with my aunt.My real mother gave me and my brother to my daddy's mother and she'd been taken care of me since i was 2 months old.Well me and my brother had to chose who we want to live with and we couldn't be separated so we had to choose daddy or aunt tinna.i chose to live with aunt tinna and Blake chose to live with daddy and i told him that i couln't live with daddy not yet because he's liven with this woman and her name is Jenny and she hates me and Blake and she try's to keep me and blake away from him and he didn't know that she hated us and so i finally talked him into liven with aunt Tinna.Well 3months has passed and Blake has been hiting me and leaving bruces on me.So i try to not do any thing to make him mad.But my cousin has high blood presure and she's only 15 and my aunt is really scared and it's been all bout kc and i get really tire of it and so when i hear her talken about kc i go away cause i get really mad because it's to much kc and not enough Hailey so i have been really mad these passed 2 weeks.i mean,i know she is scared and i am to but it is all about her.But anyway daddy had gotten really mad because me and Blake chose aunt Yinna over him.And so 1 summer ago we go to spend time with daddy and it was in august and i had gotten in troble by jenny and she was goin to hit me as hard as she could but she decided not to insted she called aunt tinna and told her what i did to brandon my brother and aunt tinna told her to woop me but she didn'd insted she said that Blake tylor,and brandon could do any thing they wanted and that i had to watch and that was mostly my punish ment.well at the end well 3 days before july was over we got to go back home because daddy and jenny had gotten into a big fight and daddy called aunt tinna to come and pick us up and well we went home that night and i was so happy.well thats all i got to say and i got to go bye
- Hailey D.

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:50:15 PM
i am currently in a FWB "relationship" and i think its kinda fun. give you a chance to maybe try to new things or freshen up on your skills if you know what i mean. as long as you use protection everytime...your good to go :]
- becca

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:47:38 PM
i really think its not right to have friends with benefits its nasty and kind of dumb i personally think if you have friends with benefits nobody will take you serious...
- CRISTAL

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:46:16 PM
I mean all i can say is why ruin a good frienship by being "friends with benifits?" i mean there is the possibility you can get attached to this person emotioanlly. And if you accidently came ou pregnant how are you gonna explain to your kid that his father was a friend with benifits only a friend. I dont think being great friends includes a baby or even std's
- Ana

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:45:18 PM
Friends with benefits to me is really harmfull. Look at what it does spirtually. Your constantly thinking that your going to hell because God could never possibley forgive you for what you have done and what you are doing!!
- Dean P.

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:44:53 PM
Hey, Dawson. My name is joshua W. and I listen to you show everynight and I relize that alot of the people you talk to call back to let you know that your advice helped and that they're doing better. For instance last night Alan from Tulsa, Oklahoma called back after 2 years to let you know that he's happily married and isn't thinking about suicide any longer. Well anyhow. I just turned 18 in October. I've been in Treatment Centers and Group Homes for the past 5 years. I'm now at a foster home in Montana. I've had a lot of family problems and my mom and brother are somewhere in missoula Montana. they're both doing drugs. My brother was supposed to be getting married but dissappeared shortly after the news. Now he has a child who was born in april of '07 and both my brother and the mom of the child are drug addicts so the baby probably isn't entirely right. I don't think he shoyuld have the child. but I can't do anything about it cause all I know is that he's hiding out in missoula and hangs out at ****** School Park.but my question was "What do I do?" Tonight I was planning on trying to give you a call. Today is November 26th 2007. Thanx for your time and hope to talk to you later. Joshua W.
- Joshua W.

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:16:29 PM
im from ***** county and a lot of my friends have friends with benifits and most of it is going down hill as we speak. even though it was my friends idea she is getting very hurt and she has become pregnant and she wants to abort the baby and i dont know how i can help her.
- Elizabeth C.

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:10:26 PM
i don't understand the conection being strong enoguh for just friends to have sex.
- allison

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:09:37 PM
just say no to the "FRIEND ZONE"
- caleb w.

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:08:46 PM
I think that friends with benifits is not a good thing because its pretty much making the girl a guys sideline sex buddy.
- Amber

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:07:34 PM
I love your show Keep up the good work
- Hope

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 11:06:54 PM
dawson thanks for the time to show us though are hard times p.s.i am a big fan dude
- brent

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 3:36:35 AM
ya i had the same thing and still got hurt so i quit with FWB cuz well it can get you PG and you not know who the daddy is and well you loose great friendships and it is stupied......
- Sara B.

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 12:28:59 AM
well for one it is not right!, and two the preteens to teenagers that are doing it are just setting themselves up for hurt and chances to get pregnant. i just dont think that "bed buddies" is a good thing.ladies find the man that loves and cares for you the same way you do for him, respect each other and dont settle for less. yes relationships can be hard but isn't that the way it goes???
- clayton v.

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 12:23:54 AM
I believe the idea of friends with benefit started as a way for people to avoid rejection but in the end that's what happens. This is because someone always happen to fall in love and gets hurt really bad. Friends with benefit is a perfect idea in theory but in reality it hurts more than a real relationship. If you're not someone that has emotional block and only get attached when you want to don't EVER engage in it because not only will you get your heart broken you'll also loose a friend. The void will be twice as big as what it's suppose to be.
- nike

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 12:20:00 AM
i have hade over 20 friends with benifits and we have hade sex and im 15 over 20 guys is a bad thing right? but it is so good till a real realationship comes like i really like one of my friends with benifits all he wants is benifits and i hate it because i feel like i love this guy he tells me all the time i want to be with you but...... i will be 18 soon or what would your parents say stuff like that but the sex is great and im just lost i guess
- kaitlynn

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 12:10:37 AM
The main thing I can think of is if you have many fwb (friend with benefits) there is a higher chance on getting STDs!! Also I don't want to be a dad yet so I wouldnt go around having sex. But some would say well use a condom, well it doesnt work every time, so I dont want to risk it. Also if the 2 involved have been best friends for a really long time that could wreck their friendship. I'm scared of being rejected, but if it happens it happens. I dont need someone to have sex with just to have sex and not to worry about being hurt or rejected I dont know what its like seeing as im 16 and haven't had a fwb idk what its like. I dont plan on ever doing that. I have a gf and we are fine with where we are at. We still are virgins and are waiting for the right time (if it ever occurs).
- Joe

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 12:09:59 AM
I too was in two relationships that was just friends with benefits. I think that it definately has its drawbacks. The first one was with a guy that was seven years younger than me and he got really attached and that hurt him in the long run. The second time was with a guy that i had been best friends with for 17 years and guess what we are no longer friends. The sex thing ruined our friendship. But the worst reprocussion,I think, especially for the younger groups, college and high school students, is that the guy is applauded for his conquests and the girl gets all the rumors. I know this sounds sort of old school, but old habits die hard and it will always stand that the guy gets the praise for the number of sexual partners and the girl always gets the short end of the stick. I read that one of your listeners said that she wants a relationship and cant get into one because all of the guys just want a sex only relationship with her. This is because the word is out. They know that she had friends with benefits relationships with other guys and that is all that they want her for now. It sucks I know. But that is they way that society thinks. Its not right that they guy is treated like a king because of it and the girl gets all the punks thinking that just because she did it before that this one thing is all that she is good for. So all I have to say is "Ladies choose carefully what you do in a sexual relationship, because they guys will always spread the news and so will their friends and so on. So think hard whether you want to compromise your reputation before you put yourself in that situation, and if you do put yourself there make sure that you can handle the consequences."Be Safe!!
- christy b.

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 12:04:30 AM
Here's the problem with friends with benefits. Sure, they sound great; You don't have to worry about the drama behind a relationship, you have somebody there that seems to care, but you don't have to worry about commitment. Yeah it sounds amazing, and it sounds like it would solve all the problems. Here's the thing though- girls will be girls. And girls will get attached. Regardless of how much you insist that you're not going to get attached, it will happen to a certain extent. I know that sounds sexist, but it's true. And maybe the guy will get a certain amount of attachment as well, but for them it is honestly easier to contain their feelings to below the waist. It really is harder for girls. And so in the end, someone will get hurt. They really will. It's inevitable, and that right there is the biggest problem with friends with benefits.
- Dana

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 12:02:26 AM
I have a bunch of guys that want me 2 be there frnds w. Benifits but im not sure i want 2 do that. Yet there is a part of me that is considering being a friend w. Benfits.
- Jel

Monday, Nov 26, 2007 - 12:00:26 AM
I personally think that "Friends with Benefits" really show the immaturity in the young people of today. I'm not saying there are not older generations doing this, but it's a rare and un-heard of thing. If you want to put yourself in one of the most dangerous situations in your life. Enjoy your Friend with Benefits. Having your heart broken, not trusting men/woman, or not wanting to be in a relationship are sorry excuses for the whole FWB phenomenon. It's kind of like the Lipstick Parties, Friends Forever Parties, or the Colored Bracelet Parties. Kids are getting AIDS!! 1 Young Adult is affected with the AIDS virus every day. 1 out of 4 people have Herpes. (And I am probably being "nice" with my statistics) I don't care about their emotions and heart breaking, because we all have wonderful, amazing and strong hearts. Getting over Relationships are hard, but not that hard. What happens when you get AIDS? What really happens then? You want to mope around talking about getting your heart broken from puppy love? Or liking the fact that you can keep the "relationship drama" at bay? Keep doing what you are doing, and you really will know what being hurt is. And, I am a Mother of 2. My Daughter is 10. There is no way I would even accept this in my, let alone, her life. I not saying, "Oh, my Daughter would NEVER do anything like that!" I won't put her or my Son on a pedestal. But, if I found out about this...things would not be good in my household for sometime. So, I ask...where are the Parents in this? Why have girls and boys turn to the un-educated, I only will think about myself friends? Open up to your Parents. Things are not always pretty when you turn to your Parents...but, trust me...you will Thank them in the end. Life isn't about the quick and easy satisfactions, it's about the life long satisfactions. Who is going to really respect you? Are you going to appreciate yourself in 10 years after doing something like this? Question your actions now, they make for a much easier and clean road in the future. Love God, and Love yourself. Two of the most important people in YOUR life!
- Shannon

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 11:43:35 PM
your topic "friends with benefits" is kinda tricky. Sure it's nice for some people, but others not so fun. There is alot of problems that go with this topic. The main one is with us girls. Most of us do get attached way too easy, some can turn their emotions off really quick to whre it doesn't bother them, then you have the others who turn into an emotional wreck. I think it's better to be friends than to be friends with benefits, because what happens when you guys fight, no more friendship and you've probably just ruined the chances of the best sex of your life.
- Alicia L.

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 11:42:45 PM
I have had friends with benifits before and it was hard. I found myself falling in love with him and but it was hard because we both agreed just to be friend with benifits but I didn't know the emotional attachment that would come along with it. Then I found out that he had friends with benifits with a lot of other girls and it hurt me to know I was just another make on his tally sheet. So I stopped the whole friends with benifits thing and I don't think I could ever do it again because it all made me feel used.
- lauren

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 11:40:49 PM
By having sex, you are emotionally connecting with the other person, whether you believe that or not. Your brain releases hormones that make you feel dreamy and happy and all that good stuff... and with girls (I know from experience)this can grow into feelings. So you feel safe and protected while he's holding you, but then he leaves... and you're left wanting more than sex. That's a major drawback. I'll never do it again... it broke my heart.
- Amanda

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 11:40:22 PM
It sounds good in the beginning but the more you have it && the longer you do it the more it begins to hurt && in the end you realize it wasn't worth it because your not in realationship && at anytime they can leave you && you cant do anything about it because you were "just friends".
- Liz B

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 11:37:17 PM
My friend likes to have sex....with almost EVERYONE. Of course she will always wear a condom and birth control...But it is almost guaranteed that she will have sex with who ever boyfriend she is with at the time. She doesn't seem to get attached, and she sometimes will even cheat on them with her ex-boyfriend...who has even said he wants "nothing to do with her". I don't neccisarily think this is 'friends with benefits' but I don't understand why she does it. It's like she NEEDS sex, whether it's a friend or not. If one guy says he's h***y she goes "OKAY!" and gets down to the dirty buisness. She is just passed around....I don't think you should have sex with ANYONE unless it's the one you love...sex is a powerful thing and when you have sex your souls combine and become one. The more people you have sex with...the more you give your soul away. I also learned that the hard way and I feel empty now for having sex...like a hole in a matress....Sex is not good unless it's with someone you want to spend the rest of your life with...Sex is also there so you can MAKE BABIES, that is why animals have sex. Yeah we're not animals but still....you should treat yourself with somthing other than spreading yourself around for the world's most disgusting people to enjoy.
- Dana

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 11:25:40 PM
It sounds good in the beginning but the more you have it && the longer you do it the more it begins to hurt && in the end you realize it wasn't worth it because your not in realationship && at anytime they can leave you && you cant do anything about it because you were "just friends".
- Liz

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 11:24:19 PM
OMG!!!!!! I was riding with my friend tonight and I heard u on the radio........ F.W.B., I am in the same situation....... I am 25 with 3 kids, and a fourth on the way. Yes it's by my friend with the benefits. Everything was cool at first, we done the casual thing. But I was smart, when the feelings started coming, I got out. Then I found out I was pregnant........and my tubes were tied. He is in college, he fed me the sob story about how he wasn't ready for kids, and I was going to abort. But I didn't, and he stepped up....... well I live in Missouri, and he is from Florida. He had some type of family emergency, and moved back home, so he says. When he left we were on bad terms. I haven't said anything to him in 7 months....... I got my numbers changed and everything. Well I'm sure you are familiar with Facebook? I sent him a message asking him to take a dna test........... and he deletes his account....... yeah pathetic!!!! I want to drive to Florida to give birth, so they can do a blood test.......... so we will know right away!!! I mean its a good thing for the time being, but you will always have feelings for someone you have sex with, unless it's a one night stand, or something of that nature....
- Tiffany T.

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 9:56:30 PM
Frankly, I believe highly in sexually purity. I think it really stupid to risk a friendship over a super-good make-out session or anything else like that. Your husband/wife is out there waiting for you and do you think he/she would be very impressed that you made out, had sex with your friend just for kicks. I don't think so. When you find your soul mate and they ask you how many people you have messed with, slept with do you want to have to lie because of the possible embarrassing of having messed, slept with a large amount of people just because you wanted benefits but were to chicken or lazy to get in a real relationship. I think by having friends with benefits with someone you are just doing more harm to yourself them good. If you want to mess around, kiss, or have sex with somebody or make out with them and they want to do the same with you, just get into a relationship it will hurt you less in the end. What good is the physical part of any relationship--whether it be a hug from a friend, a kiss from a relative, or snuggling with your pet--if there's no emotion or attachment behind it? Without the emotional and mental intimacy, it's no different from animals rutting on the Discovery Channel. Those two components are what set humans apart from the rest of the animal kingdom. I think 'friends with benefits' is basically saying, 'you're not my type to be in a relationship with, but being able to cop a feel when needed.' That's also saying, 'I don't respect your mind, thoughts, or body. It just means that you either 1) doesn't like the other person enough to go out or 2) you have a reputation to uphold and you wouldn't be caught dead with the person. Especially if you were in a relationship with the person. I prefer to hook up with people I'm in a relationship with because it's not confusing and I think it's just more 'perfect.' If you have genuine feelings for that person, it makes it more special and memorable. Friends with benefits? More than friends? Don't sample the goodies unless you're willing to risk addiction and withdrawal.
- Yevgenia

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 9:55:19 PM
there are no negatives when it comes to friends with benefits. you get ahhmazing sex w/o any strings and its fun and because they're ur friend u dont have to worry about them rejecting u really its just an ahhmazing .. experience. . .
- megan

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 7:51:15 PM
Usually someone ends up getting hurt.
- bdwiebdw

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 6:06:10 PM
pretty much if your in it for sex your only in it for a broken heart.
- r@inY

Sunday, Nov 25, 2007 - 6:05:49 PM
Very interesting topic. As a youth minister and worship leader for many years, it breaks my heart to see young people settle for less than God's best. It's not about sex. The sexual act is simply a temporary solution to other issues, most of which go undedected or acknowledged, the need to be loved. God can provide that so much better through the relationship with His Son Jesus and than any earthly friend, no matter what the benefits may be. Even Christian young people buy this lie. Hearts turned to the Lord will walk away from sin, not into their friend's bedroom. the other reason I wrote.... do you still do Student Conferences? I have attended more than a dozen.... in fact in Denver at Cherry Hills Church, you even gave me a free Tshirt to honor my 10th or 11th conf. I am also a friend of Joel Engle, friends of his parents and have ministered in his home church in Enid, OK. Please let me know at your convenience about the conferences. thanks, God bless, a prayer warrior, PJ
- Peggy Jo

Saturday, Nov 24, 2007 - 5:52:30 PM
I think that the negatives tend to be how attached you can get. The girl typically gets more attached that then guy, but it can happen the other way around. I think this is why some friends with benefits relationships turn into relationships. I think the emotional part comes in when one party is hoping that the "casual" relationship will turn serious, and then when it doesn't after having sex so many times, it feels like a break up. The key to a friends with benefits relationship is to keep your hopes down. Realize that it's no going to turn into anything more, and play the game just as good as the other person. Make sure you both are on the same page. If you tend to get attached, don't do it, and if you want something more, don't do it. People tend to get really hurt because they feel like they did something wrong when it all crashes and crumbles, when in reality, the whole point to the friends with benefits is that you can get both things - friends and the benefits - and nothing more. If done right, it's a fool proof plan. But if you become weak and let the other person in too deep, it's all down hill from there. I'm a sexual abuse case and it's easy for me to just have sex and not get emotionally attached so I feel like I have the upper hand. however, when I do want to get emotionally attached, I can't. I'm really in the fool proof plan. Just friends and sex. Even if the sex doesn't do anything. I'm good for something.
- Christina

Saturday, Nov 24, 2007 - 5:32:17 PM
someone usually gets hurt, and it's usually the female. Man don't want a commitment, and girls just want to have some one and feel loved regardless of the situation.
- Monica

Saturday, Nov 24, 2007 - 5:31:20 PM
i think the problems will come up latter when a person is getting serious with someone. u could start to feel guily about all of the 'friends with benifits' they had and they might start comparing all the people.
- Anna

Saturday, Nov 24, 2007 - 12:48:11 AM
friends with benefits is fine!!!!
- katie

Friday, Nov 23, 2007 - 7:41:02 PM
i think theyr okay
- luke

Friday, Nov 23, 2007 - 2:21:58 PM
those that have the 'friends w/benefits' relationships actually dont become satisfied because they do it again.so thats only temporary satisfaction,which leads to a screwed up life.also, those that dont get out of it have no self control,and they are abusing and de-valuing their own body.save the 'benefits'part for marriage.you are much more valuable,and that way,no one can walk all over you.you'll be much more content and stable.EVERYONE CAN overcome that 'need'... if only you believe.
- cindi

Thursday, Nov 22, 2007 - 10:49:31 PM
I think it is umm bad because then you don't have the right relasonship like i didn't have one with my boyfriend Willy
- Ally

Thursday, Nov 22, 2007 - 11:50:29 AM
But i'm talking about now. But yea later in life it will hurt very bad when you are married???? But it would not hurt.
- jamie h.

Thursday, Nov 22, 2007 - 1:42:01 AM
I think it would if you love the peroson that you are having sex with couse if you didn't then why would you do it. No not really its just saying that its that your very good firends but you like to have sex with the guy. So your saying that if I have sex with this guy that is my friend but we have benefits that i'm going think of him as a nother guy that I talk to. Not real so ppel is just having sex with the guy that they have benefits to get the one that she really dose love. To me its just something a firend would do. Jamie h.
- jamie h.

Thursday, Nov 22, 2007 - 1:41:15 AM
hey, I have been friends with this one guy for almost 2 years and we are having benefits with eachother when his grilfriend is not there
- jamie h.

Thursday, Nov 22, 2007 - 1:40:42 AM
I think if you are a friend with benifits your crazy and stupid have you ever thought what that would do to you later in life when you are married???? don't make more thing for you to regret later on in your life.
- Abigail

Wednesday, Nov 21, 2007 - 12:03:57 AM
First off...i don't think sex should just be a casual thing...I'm not going to sit here and preach the Bible cuz I'm not as innocent as I wish I was...but Sex should not be advertised as a casual occasion....but Friends with Benefits is basically just a more polite way to say I'm a slut and I sleep with who I want...cuz that's what it comes down to..the person these ppl are casually having sex with don't mean anything more to them than anyone else...therefore they are just out looking for ppl they can "get some from"..to me this is nothing more than putting a polite term on the word Slut!
- Britt

Wednesday, Nov 21, 2007 - 12:02:20 AM
Friends with benefits also ruins friendships, because somebody always gets attached, and the one that gets attached is the one that gets hurt in the end and possibly loses a friend this way....I don't think anybody else's answers will be as close or as accurate as mine!!!!
- Melissa E.

Wednesday, Nov 21, 2007 - 12:02:05 AM
Hey Dawson...I've heard some of your show on the radio. I think it's amazing what you do. But anyway, I've read this and I've thought bout it. I know many people who have friends with benifits. Even when they're dating someone. I find it stupid, but I've done it before too. Like, I'm doing it now. Only, me and my friend are talking bout getting into a relationship. But many people have frineds with benifits. They could be scared to fall in love or they're just wanting sex. I'm not quite sure. But my opinion is it's silly and shouldn't be done. There's many people who think that sex is everything. Well, it's NOT. But sometimes, the whole friends with benifets turn into relationships. But not always. But I can't say it's stupid, seeing how I've done it and I'm doing friends with benefits now. But who knows what could happen? Any other feedback would be great.
- Samantha

Wednesday, Nov 21, 2007 - 12:01:01 AM
Hi Dawson. I love listening to your radio show on Sunday nights. You give good straightforward advice and it helps me be the best I can be. Thanks! I reccomend doing a blog about teens whose parents are drug addicts and alcoholics. My dad is one. Thank you!
- Kelsey

Tuesday, Nov 20, 2007 - 11:56:41 PM
ithink that its very wrong but for some people it satisfies them
- kattie

Tuesday, Nov 20, 2007 - 11:55:53 PM
Being A "Friends with benefits relationships" . IS not always a good idea as some people may think it is .In benefits you have to keep your self distant in order to not get attached or get hurt.Soon you'll learn to be distant with any and everyone.You become a very distant and detached.Most likely just like me You'll get too attached and someone normally gets hurts in the end .So you better me one very detached person to do so .
- Ashly

Tuesday, Nov 20, 2007 - 11:55:36 PM
Hey dm, i listen to your show all the time and the first time i heard it i was amazed by the advice you were giving and i eventually ended up calling in about my parents divorce and them making me choose weather she would stay or go to my moms. now i have another problem i was in a relationship with a senoir and it was going really good untill like a month later she broke it off beacause of the age difference she is turning 18 this month and i am 15. i think the real reason was beacuse her freinds are ragging on her for going out with a 15 year old. after we broke up a week later we started to flirt and all that and she ended up saying what do you think about friends with benefits and i said i dont really know. Now were in a friends with benefits thing and i dont know if i should stop before i get involved and get hurt or keep going and see if it turns into us dating again. pleas repley-colton
- Colton

Tuesday, Nov 20, 2007 - 11:52:56 PM
hidm i luv your show i listen to it every sunday it helps me just listing to it you are a person to look up too
- Salina B.

Tuesday, Nov 20, 2007 - 11:52:22 PM
ilove your show. i listening every weekends.thank you for helping other people.
- elena

Tuesday, Nov 20, 2007 - 11:52:01 PM
I REALLY ENJOYED READING YOUR BLOG. I LISTEN TO YOUR SHOW EVERY SUNDAY NITE ON MY WAY HOME FROM WORK. I KNOW THAT THERE ARE A LOT OF TEMPTATIONS OUT THERE IN THIS WORLD AND SOMETIMES ITS HARD FOR US YOUNG ADULTS TO STAY AWAY BECAUSE WE ARE BLIND AND WHAT WE SEE AT THE TIME LOOKS GOOD WITHOUT US LOOKING AT ANY PROBLEMS THAT MAY OCCUR IN THE PROCESS OF IT ALL. I KNOW THAT I HAD MOVED IN WITH A BF OF MINE AN 6 MONTHS LATER I SEEN MYSELF MOVING OUT WITH NOWHERE TO GO WITH MY 8 YR. OLD DAUGHTER. THAN MOVED IN WITH A FRIEND AND THINGS WERE GOING WELL AND THAN I HAD TO LEAVE THERE AFTER 2 MONTHS CAUSE THE LANDLORD SAID I HAD TO GO. NOW HERE I AM WITH NOWHERE TO GO ONCE AGAIN WITH THIS CHILD OF MINE. NOW SHE IS LIVING WITH HER DAD AND I AM RENTING A ROOM. I HAVE BEEN WORKING HARD AND STARING TO COME OUTTA THE HOLE AND MY DAUGHTER AND I ARE NOW MOVING NEXT MONTH TO OUT OWN PLACE WE ARE BOTH EXCITED. BUT I KNOW ONE THING ANYONE WHO RADS THIS REMEBER ONE THING DONT GIVE UPO THERE IS HOPE AND ALWAYS PRAY ON IT AND GOD WILL ANSWER YOUR PRAYERS IF U BELIEVE IN HIM. HE OPENS DOORS FOR YOU WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT THINGS TO HAPPEN. NANCY
- NANCY

Tuesday, Nov 20, 2007 - 11:44:31 PM
Your show inspires me to help others. Thank you so much for being a good role model in my life. I'll be listening to you next Sunday!
- Meghan

Tuesday, Nov 20, 2007 - 11:37:45 PM
Hey Dawson, I listen to your show every Sunday and i found out that you and your staff are really helpful. I just wanted to say keep up the awesome job and keep helping people.
- Kaite P.

Tuesday, Nov 20, 2007 - 11:36:30 PM
It's bad to have friends with benefits bcuz you never know who that friend is having friends with benefits also. you could be doing the whole neighborhood!!!!!!!!
- Selena

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 11:00:37 PM
HI DM, I listen to ur show all the time on the weekends and I fell in love with it I just love u when u tell the people the truth and u really help people. But I have a friend with benefits but its weird because he now asks me to buy him things so I dont know if we should no longer have the friend with benefit relationship because I dont want it with him. Its just weird that he asked me to buy him stuff like I am his girl friend. I think I am just resting on friends with benefits.
- angelia

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 11:00:10 PM
I am 17 and have neverhad a friend wit benefit!!! I have had friends that have had a friend wit benefits and its kinda like what i have already read! The only other thing i have to add is they dont relize it is a relationship! What i mean by this is they go on "dates" just not as romantic as most dates!! Then they hang out talk know more about one another then they think and the added sex!!!
- sammy

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 10:59:32 PM
Hey Dawson! So I'm not in a friend with benifits relationship, I never have been but I was reading your blog and it took me by surprise a little because the way I thought of friends with benifits is not only the sex part of it but that he guy or the girl was flirting a lot with eachother, or they would kiss eachother on the cheek or somethings like that. So is friends with benifits only the sex part of it or is it flirting or kissing when you know you shouldn't also? And I personally think that if your willing to be involved in sex with a friend that you should be willing tohave a relationship with boyfriend/girlfriend. Except maybe you would need to start that relationship off slow and ake deffinate boundries and make sure that person knew exactly what you wanted out of the relationship.
- Clara

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 10:51:56 PM
Haha, it's so ironic because just few hours back my friend I was talking about this topic. From my perspective Sex is something you should save up for when it's the "RIGHT" time like when your married. Having sex is sort of like a commitment, you have to accept the consequences that may be waiting. Premarital sex is a big issue here in United States, teenagers as young as 12 years old are having sex with other teens. This effects our societies dramatically. I think "Friends with benefits" are for people who are unsecured about themselves and just want to hide it by having sex with other teens. If your proud you should not be afraid to tell your friends that you are a "Virgin" b/c after all being a virgin isn't a bad thing, it's something you should be proud of. -Jay Chung
- Jay Chung

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 10:50:41 PM
I think that friends with benefits is ok, just as long as you don't have sex. Having sex with a friend you have feelings for, is a real way to screw yourself over. I have one friend who was BEST friends with a guy, then they had sex. And now they glare at each other as if about to go into battle. And on the hookup topic, I really think it depends on your type of personality. If you're emotionally strong, or even just used to the feeling, than it may not phase you. But I definately don't recommend it. Thanks for all you do Dawson.
- -adam e.

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 10:50:08 PM
I really like what ur doing for ppl,but I have some problems of my own.I don't like to talk over the phone much so if u could just e-mail me i'll will tell u what all is going on...Thank you and have a nice day.
- Katie

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 10:47:53 PM
my friend has other friends with benefits and it got her pregnant, she got an abortion, switched schools,got kicked out of her stepmom's house with her dad and now has more friends with benefits. and now i never get to see her or talk to her and i'm worried about her.
- emmaline

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 10:21:20 PM
Heyy Dawson, I herd your show last night and herd you talking about how "friends with benefits" would be on your blog. So i'm school on your web page. This subject is tricky because I can't see no problem with haveing only a friends with benefits, but it doesn't make it right. It can really mess you up mentaly. Because after that "fun" goes away you may never have that same friend that you use to have before you started to have sex with that person. In my case it has never happened. Personaly i don't think it is worth losing a good friendship over.
- Bree

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 10:16:53 PM
hey dawson what's been up? me okay i guess living life i guess i listen to your show every sunday and i want you to know that you do a good job on advice and helping young kids like me....well to answer your question about "friends with Benfits" i been in that postion where im just hooking up a guy i lost my virginity to a guy who i thought loved me but turn out others ways. Now i been in really bad realtionships and i been hurt so bad that i cant cope from the past so when my boyfriend says he loves me it hurt. but i know that it only hurt worse when i just have sex with someone. so i want thank you.
- latasha

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 10:14:25 PM
hey dawson i was listenin glast night and i know a couple of people from my school who are like that because they want a rep. on how good they give and recive it and it is so wrong because 8 girls are now pregnent!! It is soooo wrong
- Heather

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 10:12:08 PM
i was just driving home at 2am and was listening to your radio show. i have been listening to it for awhile now and never thought to look you up. when i hear everyones problems, i think to myself and say, "i know how that person feels, ive been there and that has happened to me quit a few times". everyone has problems at some point and time. ive been through so much in my lifetime that i find myself giving out personal advice. ive been from child abuse mentally and physically to the whole i dont want to live anymore scene, and believe me there are people like you that made me realize that i am worth living. i love your radio show and please dont stop doing it. Danielle (22 years old)
- Danielle D.

Monday, Nov 19, 2007 - 12:43:26 AM
Hi Dawson. I heard a bit of your show on the radio by chance tonight, and I heard something about "friends with benefits" on your website, so I rushed to jot down the URL and I hopped on the net to check it out. You see, this phrase has been haunting me a lot the past couple weeks, though before it didn't phase me. I grew up in a conservative religious (Christian) background and was raised believing no sex until marriage, and one true love for life. I really believed and defended that stance up until a few months ago, when a potential "marriage" relationship ended after 2.5 years because the guy just didn't want to be in a relationship. We never even got things going. The most we did was hold hands for 5 min, and that was awkward. I was happy to be free from a miserable relationship I felt trapped in, but it also left me very jaded about being the good Christian girl and doing things the right way. Two months ago, I moved out of my house to live with a church family because I wanted to gain independence from my family and really challenge myself to deal with my issues (an eating disorder and confidence) and grow up. This has been an overall good experience. Unfortunately, there had been a guy I met from the local college who I clicked with, and I began casually "dating" him, just as friends. I knew he was attracted to me, but I just like the attention I'd never received from my "ex" and having a new friend to be with. I told him about my beliefs and my background, and he said he understood where I was coming from, that he used to be the same way, but then something changed. And now, of course, he's not a virgin. We always talked about how we were not going to have sex but the tension was there, and I think we liked playing with fire. I began to like him more for his quirkiness and playfulness, and he was always complimenting me on how attractive I looked to him. After going out for coffee, the park, a couple meals, movies, etc, I asked about our relationship status. He said he didn't want to put a label on it; didn't want to call me his "girlfriend." I considered him my friend who I liked to flirt with and have a good time. He made me happy when I was with him. We were able to connect because we're both 21 and going through some of the same issues like looking at our futures, breaking free from parents, etc. A little over a week ago, I lost my virginity to him. It was kind of unplanned, but I knew in my mind that day from the time I woke up, that if I came over to see him, it was going to happen. I was an emotional wreck from the day before when I was told by my boss that she wanted to demote me. So in the moment, on that day, it was very easy for me to have an "I don't care. What the Hell" attitude about the beliefs I grew up with. I talked about it with the guy, and he still doesn't want to call our relationship anything official. He says he doesn't think he can be a very good boyfriend to me now. We still keep contact like before, but still have just had sex once. We both say no more sex unless it gets serious, but we said something the last time that we went back on. I'm really trying hard to sort things out. Losing my virginity is a big no-no in my church community, and I feel a certain level of guilt. Also, should I think of this guy as a scum-bag who doesn't care about me, or a guy who's confused about what he wants and needs to grow up? I feel so alone right now. I feel like a big part of me is missing. I really DO want the emotional attatchment and commitment of a relationship, but I seem to have trouble finding that. Any feedback whatsoever would be greatly appreciated.
- Cara

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 11:58:33 PM
Some negitives to a friend with benifit relationships might be going behind their backs, lying to them all of the time, or even hurting any parts of their body,even their feelings, and those are some negatives to a friend with benifit relationships.
- Abbie O.

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 11:28:34 PM
Well, I can only speak from a female perspective about the negatives to a "friends with benefits" relationship. My experience has been that in the beginning it is great, but eventually it turns sour. As we all know, women are much more emotional than men and we yearn to not only be held and be intimate, but to also have someone to call our own--someone who will say "I love you" and actually mean it. That's the problem with "FWB" relationships. We "feel" loved, we "feel" special, we "feel" like we have someone to call our own and when we begin to develop real feelings for this guy, we get angry because he's spending too much time with someone else or not enough time with you. We are suddenly and brutally slammed to the blacktop of reality when he says "but I'm not looking for commitment..I thought you knew that." That's when we realize that we just allowed someone to use us, lower our self-esteem and confidence. This is just the emotional side of it..there's also the risk of getting STD's and so on. "FWB" relationships just aren't worth it in my opinion.
- Brandi

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 11:06:41 PM
I can see all the reasons listed above as good reasons for the whole friends with benefits thing. Here is MY take on the issue. I was sexually abused by my first 'real' boyfriend and now im scared to be with anyone before getting to know them really well. I dont do the friends w/ benefits thing before getting to know them really well. Most understand where I am coming from. I would rather go to a good friend that I know that I can trust before hooking up with some random guy. Thats the only reason I even think about doing it.
- Chelle

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 10:59:58 PM
at the beggining of the year i met a new friend that was a new kind of friend... he was different then the others but i still thought he was cool. so i went over to his house only to find that he does pot. he offered me some and i rejected it and left. but i cant get over the fact that he still wants me to hang around him. i told him i dont believe in drugs but he still does it.
- Ben

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 10:54:22 PM
I think friends with benefits is something that people just call other people. And when I say call people, I mean people they just want to call and have sex with and only sex. I believe its someone you would just have sex with, but would not go out with, as well as have emotional feelings towards. [[It is a bit hard to explain.]]
- marissa

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 10:34:15 PM
I found out that my best friend that i have known for ever was having sex, and doing other things with one of my best guy friends. i had confronted her and asked her what was going on, she had then admitted to my face that she and my guy friend were friends with benefits. stupid me forgave her and about a week ago i found out she was doing it again with another one of my friends. we are still "friends" but we are not as tight as we use to be. if you are going to do a guy at least do it because you care about each other. chicks before d***s not the other way around
- cynthia

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 10:27:03 PM
I have to say that friends with benefits is wrong but it happens. I have been married for 9 years and have relized that he had friends with benefits the whole time. Now that the marriage is over I find myself with male friends but I dont want a relationship with them but I want the sex part of life. I think that the friends with benefits can save alot of hurt feelings because the people involved know there are no commitments. I know that it is wrong and I know that there are some feelings that will get hurt but when you let them know ahead of time you can't be held responsible for those hurt feelings. The Lord is my sheperd and I know with what I'm doing is wrong and I'm working on stopping it but I just cant figure out how before I ruin my life and someone elses life
- Shelley

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 10:12:19 PM
dawson your a good man. i like to listen to your show on sunday nights. you do a great thing helping all these people. i see the pain people go through. everyone has a huge amount of pain or someone that hurt you. even i do. maybe you should get something were u can have a privite chatroom on here just between u and the person. you might already but i havent noticed. you really are a good man.its really great to know that if i need someone to talk to i can call you and you will be able help me. bye dawson.
- Hannah =]

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 10:11:15 PM
okay so i met this guy robert about almost 3 months ago at the beggining of the school year. and after 2 weeks we were already best friends.. then he hung out with me after school and we ended up makin out and it started leading to other stuff.. then eventually a month later he asked me out. but then 3 weeks after that he broke up with me.. cause he said that he was afraid of commitment and getting hurt again emotionially.. cause he said he was starting to fall in love with me. and i was already in love with him.. so now i jus cant get over him and when he broke up with me he said we were gonna be friends with benefits again. but then he was like oh well.. its gonna be to hard on you and idk.. and i kno he cares about my feelings alot because everytime i would cry over him in school he would get really upset.. and like he has 10 holes in his wall now cause of me.. and he cried like 5 times to me over the phone.. and i kno he still has feelings for me but idk.. i jus cant get over him.. then he was like i mite ask u out again later on.. i jus dont kno anymore. but i wanna be friends with benefits with him again and idk wut to do cause i wanna ask him and when me and him were friends w/benefits everything was fine cause i jus saw us as best friends that had fun :] but then he f***ed everything up and now i dont want a boyfriend for a reallly really really long time.. it sucks. idk wut to do.. im never gonna get over him and we've been broken up for about almost 3 weeks now.. and me and him are still bestfriends.. but hes not the same as before we went out.. hes alot different and it hurts.. i guess this kinda comments on the blog.. but idk i just needed to get that outta my system.
- Jessica

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 9:58:34 PM
I rely live your show!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- court

Sunday, Nov 18, 2007 - 7:30:12 PM
It's probably not the smartest or best thing as far as "relationships" go, but I think that if two people both mutually agree that their relationship will be (sex?) [fill in the blank], then I don't see anything wrong with that. Some people don't have the same values and don't even consider saving themselves for marriage. I believe it's a personal choice. Also, in response to Josh's comment, I disagree with the 'live for the future' part of this last statement. I say that because there IS NO certain future for any of us, and if you put off enjoyment today, the opportunity may never come again. But I'm glad if that's his view, because this is mine. Now of course, everything I have just said can be argued, but again, this is just my personal view on the issue.=D
- Amber

Saturday, Nov 17, 2007 - 2:24:48 PM
i have a gfriend that i think she dosent know what friends with benefit means and this boy that she likes he realyy wants to have a friend's beenfit with her.....WHAT DO I DO?
- gabbie

Saturday, Nov 17, 2007 - 2:24:38 PM
I think friends with benefits aren't good. You can't save yourself for that special person that you will marry, even if it is casual sex. Plus you don't know how many people that person has done it with. You could get AIDS, HIV, and even pregnant. And that follows you the rest of your life. I mean, if I ever need a date, one of my guy friends will go with me, but he's not a "friend with benefits". And I'll do the same for him. But I do think friends with benefits are wrong. Don't mess up your life by having "friends with benefits"!!!
- Blaine

Saturday, Nov 17, 2007 - 12:46:25 AM
I know alot of people who have Friends with benefits. But here is the scoop. Yes it's sex. Yes it's a no commitment deal. But what happens when you find a life partner? There is where you have to stop and think. Because what if one of these FWB has an STD? You have passed it along to other FWB and you just pass it along over and over untill most of your friends are sick from the illness spread from these FWB. I have had a few ppl ask me to be a FWB. I refuse them because I look at what damage will be done and what can be done. FWB don't have a proper place in life when you find the one you love you will just harm them more with them finding out you have had FWB. You give up your purity with these people and not with your future spouse. Look at life as a distance shot. Don't live for the now. Live for the future.
- Josh

Saturday, Nov 17, 2007 - 12:44:45 AM
If you have known a guy for awhile and have been going out with him for a long time and you think you're old enough then thats when you have sex not when you just feel like it.When you have sex just because you feel like it you could really hurt the other person if they really like you.Some negative things that can happen if you have sex with someone you don't want to have a relationship with then you can get a disease if they have one and they can pass it on to you.Also you may become pregenent and then have the baby and the guy that you had sex with will just leave and make you take care of the baby with out any of his help.Plus if you are still in school like college or highschool then you might have to give the baby up or you will have to drop out of school and you don't want your future to be hell because you had sex that one time to make you drop out because if you don't finish high school you will not get a decent job and will not be getting a lot of money ,so you would still have to just go to college your life would be sooo much easier if you did go there.So wait until you go and are done or almost done with college to have sex because you might have had sex before and you didn't get pregenent so you think its ok but that one time after that can change your whole life.If you were to have sex though be safe and use a condom to be safer.WAIT FOR SEX!!!!!!!YOU DON'T KNOW ALL THAT CAN HAPPEN!!!!!
- MARIAH

Saturday, Nov 17, 2007 - 12:40:03 AM
I once had a friend with benefits. Trust me its not worth it! Once everyone found out, I was known as the school slut. People wanted to fight me and it was just a bunch of drama. I lost tons of friends that I was so close to. And now me and the guy don’t even talk,. DON’T HAVE A FWB! Its really a waste. Find someone that you truly like. And share the “moment” with that person, not a jerk who is just using you to get “some”!
- destiny

Saturday, Nov 17, 2007 - 12:39:38 AM
there are all kinds of negatives to a frends wit benefits relationship. u could get all kinds of diseases if u dont kno or have even asked. u may get depression becasue the person u hookin up wit only wants u for ur sex so ur self esteem could go down because its no strings attached. also when ur parents find out u will get in a bunch of trouble and u will lose a bunch of trust from ur parents. so i mean there are alot of negative possiblities to frends wit benefits. not to mention ur repututation which will go down the toilet if anyone finds out wat ur doing. so yea its a hard- knock life to this situation.
- ~riah~

Saturday, Nov 17, 2007 - 12:38:33 AM
The scariest part for me of having friends with benefits was the possiblility of getting pregnant or contracting an STD. If either were to happen, abandonment would likely follow in a relationship where there is no level of committment. Pregnancy would be especially scary since it would involve another person who deserves parents who love each other and are committed to one another. I wouldn't want to be responsible for the devastation of a life that had no choice in the matter.
- Sarah

Saturday, Nov 17, 2007 - 12:37:42 AM
Dawson, i dont get the whole friends with benefits thing.. but i deffinatley know i have problems with alot of my friendsbeing close with me. i just dont like realationships that much.what should i tell my friends?
- Tina

Friday, Nov 16, 2007 - 12:33:55 AM
on the friend's with benefits topic for me it was not close friends more like casual friends and with that came casual sex but than i wanted something more from them and the problem was i couldn't say it because the agreement was there and now i have broke it off with all of the casual friends and am working on strengthening my self-esteem, which affected me because now i feel like i'm not good enough and am scared of relationship altogether.
- claudia